Wednesday, September 1, 2010

The FBI letter sent yesterday was a HOAX! (Warning: SATIRE)

NB: This entire piece, from "--begin--" to "--end--" is SATIRE, it's not true!!!! I made it all up. But this is based upon some very unfortunate facts. I intend this to be for the purpose of humor, and also for educational value. Please try to see it in that light. -- the author

-- begin --

HOAX ALERT!


Sorry about the bad information we sent out yesterday.
We have just learned that the prior memo (attached below)
claiming to be from the PA Dept. of Homeland Security and the FBI was a HOAX!

As some pointed out, it even included grammar errors. A poor attempt
by the Gas industry to scare opposition to their crimes.

However, through a FOIL request, we were able to get the REAL MEMO!



(Excerpt from today's PA Intelligence Bulletin (Official Use Only) from the FBI/Pennsylvania Department of Homeland Security, 23 Aug 10)

http://www.whitemarshtwp.org/images/police/Homeland-Security.gifhttp://theterrorjournal.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/fbi.pnghttp://www.palaborandemploymentblog.com/uploads/image/Pa%20Insurance%20Dept%20Logo.jpg

ENERGY

4. CAPITALIST EXTREMISM FROM THE ENERGY SECTOR LIKELY TO BECOME A GREATER THREAT

Capitalist extremists continue to target the local sovereignty of communities by committing fraud and crimes against nature, primarily in their desire to profit from the last drops of fossil fuel on the planet. To date, the energy industry has already committed minor crimes on a massive scale, including trespass, perjury, bribery of public officials, and constructive fraud in land contracts. But this pattern is beginning to morph - transitioning to more criminal, extremist measures, including the destruction of aquifers, air pollution, noise and light pollution, enclosure of common lands for private profits, and other increasing threats to communities and democracy by capitalist extremists.

Based on several recent reported criminal incidents by energy companies and affiliated industries or individuals, capitalist extremism will become a greater threat to local sovereignty, the fundamental principle of our American Democracy, owing to the incredible profits to be had from the myopic and toxic extraction of fossil fuels.

Our historical understanding is that some capitalist extremists have progressed from committing low-level crimes against the common people, such as usury, and wage-slavery, to more significant crimes over time, such as military-backed genocide, in their efforts to further their unholy extremist quest for profits.

The FBI also assesses - with medium confidence - extremists will continue to commit criminal activity against not only the people and the land, but also against secondary or tertiary targets. This assessment includes the use of tactics to try to intimidate the legislature and courts into making policy decisions deemed appropriate by extremists. Previous incidents also seem to support this assessment.

Note: Lack of DEP inspectors on this issue prevents analysts from making a higher confidence level at this time.

Potential Impact on Pennsylvania: Pennsylvania has already suffered greatly in the production of natural gas from drilling operations within the Marcellus Shale Formation, such as we see in Dimock, and in the Allegheny National Forest. Analysts expect that groups of capitalist extremists, gas companies, their private security, and the small number of co-opted land owners on the one hand - and the rest of We the People on the other - will be focusing their attention on one another in the future months as production increases.

-- end --

The above is, unfortunately, SATIRE....


Below is the original note
sent out to various listservs yesterday Aug 31 2010.
Despite a couple of transcription errors, it appears to be very real...



Feel free to disseminate to any and all...particularly newspaper reporters:

Excerpt from today’s PA Intelligence Bulletin (Official Use Only)
from the Pennsylvania Department of Homeland Security.

Document lists dates of “gaslander” events that could see protesting Followed by:

ENERGY
4. ENVIRONMENTAL EXTREMISM LIKELY TO BECOME A GREATER THREAT TO THE ENERGY SECTOR (extract from FBI Bulletin, 23 Aug 10)

Environmental
extremists continue to target the energy industry by committing
criminal incidents, primarily to oppose the fossil fuel industry. To date, the energy industry has encountered little more than vandalism, trespassing and threats by environmental extremists. But this pattern is beginning to morph - transitioning to more criminal, extremist measures actions. Based on several recent reported criminal incidents toward energy companies and affiliated industries or individuals, environmental extremism will become a greater threat to the energy industry owing to our historical understanding that some environmental extremists have progressed from committing low-level crimes against targets to more significant crimes over time in an effort to further the environmental extremism cause.

The FBI also assesses - with medium confidence - extremists will continue to commit criminal activity against not only the energy companies, but against secondary or tertiary targets. This assessment includes the use of tactics to try to intimidate companies into making policy decisions deemed appropriate by extremists. Previous incidents also seem to support this assessment.

Note: Lack of direct reporting on this issue prevents analysts from making a higher confidence level at this time.

Potential Impact on Pennsylvania: Pennsylvania has gained a prominent position in the production of natural gas from drilling operations within the Marcellus Shale Formation. Analysts expect that groups of environmental activists and militants on the one hand - and property owners, mining and drilling companies on the other - will be focusing their attention on one another in the future months as production increases.

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